Wednesday, February 14, 2007


Can someone please explain why the f*ck Beyonce is on the cover of SI's current swimsuit issue? No? Well, I can -- because they SOLD OUT. Not a model, not an athlete, just an over-hyped, over-exposed, old-fashioned PAIN IN THE ASS. Quite frankly, it's pathetic.

Let's face it, no one actually READS this magazine anymore unless you're stuck in the check-out line or waiting to have a cavity filled. It's dry, unimaginative and outdated. Sure, we all wanted the football phone back in the 80's, but that was before Kenny Mayne and Stuart Scott were household names. Even their commemorative issues (Superbowl, World Series, etc.) have become novelty coffee-table items that lost their luster. We're just bored.

So they did what any desperate company would do, they sold out--and bad. Not only is Beyonce undeservingly gracing the once-anticipated annual collectible, but to make matters worse, SI calls this issue "The Music Issue." Honestly, I have the slightest clue what this means. Cee-Lo in a speedo? Kanye playing polo? Rick Reilly on the Grammy's? I'm perplexed. When I think music and sports, I think "Eye of the Tiger" or "We are the Champions," not...oh wait, I don't know any songs by Shakira.

I have an idea, how about Beyonce on the cover of Playboy? Now that's progress!

No comments: